Sun 1. Numero uno

Dear reader,

Welcome to the first and hopefully regular Sunday blog series, where I.. blog on Sunday. I don't really have a structure in mind right now so I'll just wing it, but as I do this more regularly one may form. In the meantime, lets type. Also, this post will contain no content about PigeonTalk, as currently, I'm creatively flaccid.

For those interested in how these posts get written, I just start typing and see what happens. I wrote a little bit of this already last night to make it easier for myself, but that was unusual. It's mostly sitting and seeing what happens.

Looking back at some of my more recent posts, I can't help but feel that some things should have been left.. unsaid. It's all so raw and unorganised. I wrestled with this a bit over the weekend. What if you did see all this shit? Would it change the way you thought about me? Do I want it to? All these questions...

I hope you got your book back, and you took a look at some of the other short stories. I'm pretty sure I filled the right deets in, but damn that would be tragic if it got lost in transit. Such a good book, and has likely ensured I'll pursue more of Murakami's work.

Music has been therapeutic, as expected, but it feels different. I never really used to listen to much, and only did when friends were around but there's something to be said about taking in a song that someone wrote in pain. Pain you can feel in your bones. Pain you can relate to. It's been quite 'releasing' organising & updating my spot playlists. I'll come back to this in another post.

In other news, my personal notepad was a great success! To give you an idea of what I've been jotting down, here are a few high(low?)lights...
* Aug 12 Thur. STEVEN!
* Aug 13 Fri. Should dispose of this mask
* Aug 13 Fri. I hate trams (will post about this later)
* Aug 14 Sat. Dogs should laugh
* Aug 14 Sat. Wall of bees!
* Aug 15 Sun. Fuck this wind
* Aug 15 Sun. Want a carrot

Although these may make absolutely zero sense to yourself, to me you see, it's like time travel. I know exactly where I was and why I wrote them. Pretty cool if ya ask me.

I've also realised some recently. Although I may seem ~ zen ~ from the outset, I have a lot of issues. I always knew about these, but recent events seem to have made me take more notice.

Looking back at my previous 'things' with women, most of the time, especially in cases where I realise I like the person truly, I start to self-doubt, become compulsive and get anxious. Which points to co-dependency. This I don't have a silver bullet for, but I'm sure will get better as a by-product of attending to some aspects of my life that need it. I don't think it's a super bad problem, but it's something to work on for sure.

I am terrible with money. I am in debt, currently owe a few grand to zip money (lol, if you ever see this papa). I scrape through most months on bills, but spend inconceivable amounts on uber eats, printers and miscellaneous tech. Let's just say if that [scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YejpJgtQtuU) from Transformers happened in my shed, there would be problems. I make a decent amount of money, but have no savings. Although I don't have any immediate money goals / plans to travel because of covid etc, it would be nice to have the option. Money in the bank for a sporadic adventure to Nepal or 3d printer (don't even think about it Oskar).

I rarely follow through with things. How many times have I stop-started something? German (say you just started learning every.. week), learning every country (why did you even want to do this), researching the origins of rice (interesting, will revisit), building an app (insert random name here), the list goes on...

These are probably the big three. There are most certainly more, but this is what is at the forefront of my mind a the moment and I want to make a start on.

To end, here's a random fact about your blood. A way in which I used to end my posts early days. This is a bit of a long one, but promise it's interesting! So basically, you may be aware that your blood can either be + or -, e.g. A+, B-, etc.

This positive or negative nature just means whether or not your blood carries the Rhesus molecule. Now for some reason, most people seem to think this is inherited from the Rhesus macaque monkey, something I also thought. I'd even heard stories that a silly human performed unspeakable acts with said monkeys, resulting in this Rhesus factor occurring in humans. Turns out it didn't originally come from the monkey. It was just named that because these molecules were first discovered in them! Humans are also not the only species that carry a Rhesus like molecule. Some bacteria, algae and fish do too!

Also, as it turns out, this Rhesus molecule is an ancient descendent of a molecule named Amt, which is present in all life on earth, even Archaea (if you don't know what these are blow yourself away by googling..!) You can read more about this if you are so inclined here.

Until next time,
Oskar